I just got back from Monterey, CA where I booked the weekend because of work, and I thought maybe I can stay a few nights so I don't have to do the commute back and forth, but I can also clear my head a bit and get some new perspective for my tapping website, and catch up on my MBA program. I had it all planned out, and the first day went great. In bed, in my hotel room, I am watching Hot Tub Time Machine and realize I should check all the info for the next day. An hour later and late night exchanges with my client, I found out I wasn't going to do the job. The sinking feeling came in, disappointment, frustration, a level of understanding.. my trip had changed last minute. Fear of why did I book this hotel, did I just waste my money, feelings of rejection, and solid disappointment at the whole situation. Over the last couple of years i've been saying disappointment more often in explaining my emotions because I loved the definition of disappointment as "an appointment not met." ANY appointment not met, or "change," I usually have a reaction to, and being able to just acknowledge that feeling and label is disappointment has helped me better understand what I am feeling without blaming myself, or the other person involved (if there is one), and gives a little bit of space and distance to the situation and experience.
The next day I tapped about it (Check out EFT TAPPING), talked with my husband, and went to the zoo.. I still felt a bit of a fog, but I was at least not sitting in the room, shades closed, curled in fetal position motionless. After the zoo I got some Starbucks black tea, caffinated up and came back to my room to sit and work on my new website, and watch my MBA tapping videos. Movement started to happen..
The next day, at night, AGAIN, I got a new phone call, the same reason one of my jobs was cancelled over the weekend, showed itself again for work this week. Rejection, disappointment, frustration, understanding, flooded again.
Over the weekend reflection and now this.. this is what I am coming away with:
Change isn’t comfortable. And if I don’t fight it, it can be rewarding, and something bigger than me.
When things don’t work out, let it fall away, there could be something even better awaiting your focus, love, and attention, that will reap even more rewards than what left you.
I am also reminded of this exert from the Burnout book, and they talk/ define what "Positive Appraisal" means:
POSITIVE REAPPRAISAL = ACKNOWLEDGING WHEN THINGS ARE DIFFICULT, AND YOU RECOGNIZE THAT THE DIFFICULTY IS WORTH IT. *** IT IS IN FACT, AN OPPORTUNITY.